Your Words

It would be an understatement to say I'm confused.
But my guess is you are nothing more than amused.

As I ponder all your words,  I scribble in my little space.
These words are to help me say all the things I never get to say to your face.

Maybe all of our talks meant nothing to you.
It's sad I felt the opposite and they took me right out of blue.

Help me to make sense of all that you did write.
The words are engraved in my heart, & I linger over them day & night.

"I've been thinking about you for 20 years."
Those were your words that had my heart in cheers.

"I can't wait to see & touch you," is what came from your hand.
Did these words come from a boy or come from a man?

The best was the song you said was "about us" which completely broke my heart.
Here he goes again saying things of which he really wants no part.

On your behalf, you did let me know what you were really looking for.
"Side dish" was the term that burned me to the core.

Many, many words escaped from your hands onto the keys.
They really were nothing more than your lonliness and a tease.

To say I can't believe how this is turning out
Would be like me whispering when I really want to shout

None of this was my imagination.
These feelings were not all my creation.

My little heart is broken once again.
I wanted it to have a different end.

Once again, I'm just a dandelion.
And once again, I'm the one left crying.

But alas, it's way too early to cry.
I'm not even on your mind enough to say goodbye.

This feels like an old record playin.
It's the painful truth.....I'm just sayin.

I'm worth every effort that some man, somewhere, is willing to make.
I'm going to be in his head so much that me he won't be able to shake.

The very thought of me will muddle his crazy head.
The very taste of me will be all that he needs fed.

For years & years, I used to dream of him at night.
He said he dreamt of me too, & I wanted to believe that with all my might.